Family Manual

• Once a day, go out and do something for yourself. This is part of the job, not a favour you have to ask for.
• Short breaks during the day are fine too - an hour outside, a run, a coffee. Just let us know you are heading out.
• One full day off every week.
• Special holidays: ask for them and take them.
• Travelling for something personal (dentist, family, paperwork)? Add an extra day and make the trip worth it.
• You can take our motorbike to get out of the house.

We do not want one person who only does the house and one person who only does the baby. Each of you should be able to cover everything, so nobody gets stuck in one role and the house keeps running when someone is away.

• The household checklist in the app is for everyone, not just one person.
• Leo: whoever is normally on the house side takes at least one feed a day and settles him to sleep.
• Once a week that same person gives Leo his bath. The first time, the more experienced one is there to watch and correct.
• Log every feed, sleep and diaper change in the baby app - whoever did it.
• Whoever has the most newborn experience is the authority on Leo - they know more about it than we do. If something is not done right, they say so directly, and all of us listen.
• Need help setting up or configuring the app? Ask us any time.

• No silent treatment. Silence is the only thing that does not work in this house.
• Not in the mood to talk? Just say "not right now". That is a complete answer and nobody will take it badly.
• If something bothers you and you cannot say it in the moment, take your time - but come back and say it later.
• If it is hard to say face to face, send it on WhatsApp - a message or a voice note is completely fine.
• Helping another family or a neighbour for a couple of hours is fine - it is not something you need to hide.

We prioritize whole, natural foods from animal sources. We're flexible when eating out or when ideal food isn't available.

• Always eat at a table - no walking around with food, no eating on the couch
• Be relaxed and neutral about food. Don't force, don't pressure, don't make a big deal
• They don't have to finish their plate. If they stop eating, that's fine - take it away calmly
• It takes 20 minutes for the brain to feel full - don't rush meals

At every meal, always start with the protein — fish, meat, chicken, eggs, or any other protein source. Only after the protein should you introduce carbs like fruit, honey, or rice.

We minimize sunscreen. Instead we reduce exposure through clothing and timing.

• Avoid peak sun: 11am - 2pm
• Liv: long-sleeve swimwear + wide-brim hat when in the sun
• Seek shade for extended outdoor time

Two words to remember:

• RO (Philips) — best water. We add minerals back, then it's our Drinking water. Use it for drinking; great for everything else too.
• Kitchen — the kitchen drinking tap. This is our Safe water: safe to drink, and for dishes, produce, and cooking. (RO is still better for drinking.)
• House — every other tap (bathrooms, showers, garden). For showering, hand-washing, and cleaning only. NEVER drink it and NEVER wash food with it.

• No sugary drinks, no juice boxes, no soda

• Call Sean or spouse immediately
• Medical emergency: call 1669, then call parents
• Stay calm, stay with the child, describe what happened

• If the child seems sick, has a fever, or you're unsure about anything - call the parents immediately
• Don't give any medicine without asking us first

• She goes to sleep or wakes up
• You move to a new location (park, mall, friend's house, etc.)
• Anything changes from the normal routine
• She seems unwell, got hurt, or something feels off

• No posting photos of the children on social media
• No sending photos to friends or family without asking us
• Taking photos to send to us (updates, cute moments) is welcome

• 1 water bottle (new mineral water)
• 3 diapers
• 1 swimming diaper
• 1 wet wipes
• 1 small reading book
• Few hair bands
• Start of nursery week: 1 fitted sheet + 1 bed sheet (as blanket)

• 2 sets of clothes (in a ziplock)
• 2 cloth diapers (a pair)
• 1 disposable diaper
• 1 blanket
• 1 handkerchief
• 1 bib
• 1 wet wipes
• 1 bed pad
• 2 pacifiers
• 2 baby bottles, filled with fresh water
• 2 portions of milk powder (formula)

• 1 diaper
• 1 swimming diaper
• 1 tissue paper bag
• 1 toy
• 1 beach sarong
• 1 medium towel
• 1 water bottle per person

Open printable Bag Checklists

• Liv's books and games go under the TV stand or in her closet (a new dedicated spot is coming soon)
• If you're not sure where to put something new (e.g. just purchased) - put it where you think is right and send us a photo of where it is
• Shopping and groceries: always take out of the bags. Water bottles? Take out of their pack. Almost everything should be taken out of its packaging.

There is a small cash pocket for everyday household expenses. We top it up with cash from time to time. Every time money goes in or out, write one line in the printed ledger so the running Balance always shows what is left in the pocket.

• Money In = cash we add to the pocket. Write the amount in the Money In column.
• Money Out = each thing you buy. Write the date, a short description, and the amount in Money Out.
• Balance = last Balance + Money In − Money Out. Update it on every line.
• No need to keep receipts — just photograph each one, send it on WhatsApp, then throw it away.

Open printable Petty Cash Ledger

• Nothing plastic and nothing wood goes in the dishwasher.
• Everything else (glass, ceramic, metal) can go in the dishwasher.

• All plastic and all wood items must be washed by hand.
• Use mild cleaning agents — mostly water with vinegar spray.

• Only clean with water and vinegar.

We prefer peelable fruits - the peel protects from pesticides.

• Cold water + 1 tsp baking soda per 2 cups water
• Soak 10-15 minutes, rinse well, pat dry

• Remove all plastic wrapping from fruits and vegetables immediately after shopping
• Store fruits in the fridge whenever possible — pineapple, berries, and similar fruits go in the fridge
• If fridge space is not available, storing on the counter is acceptable

• Watermelon
• Pineapple
• Bananas
• Cucumber
• Carrots
• Lemon / Lime
• 2 coconuts

• Feta cheese
• Cow milk 3%, unsweetened
• Butter

• Soda water

• Honey

• Option A: Raitiaviset Organic Farm
• Option B: Deva Phruek Village

No harsh chemicals on surfaces that touch food.

Area	What to use
Kitchen / food areas	Spray bottle: water + vinegar. Optionally add a few drops of tea tree oil for smell
Bathroom & floors	Standard cleaning products are fine

We only use SLS-free, paraben-free, fragrance-free soap for the whole family — adults, Liv, and baby. No exceptions.

Product	Type	Where to buy
Kirk's Fragrance Free Castile	Bar soap	iHerb
Mild By Nature Unscented Castile ✓ Our pick	Liquid soap (1L)	iHerb →
Earth Mama Simply Non-Scents	Baby wash (185ml)	iHerb

Castile soap is fragrance-free but NOT tear-free — it's a true soap (high pH) that stings the eyes. For washing hair over the face, baby and toddler use a tear-free wash instead. Liv's body still uses the Castile above; only her hair needs the shampoo.

Who	Product	Where to buy
Baby (Leo) ✓ Our pick	Vanicream Baby Foaming Wash — tear-free hair + body	iHerb →
Toddler (Liv) — hair ✓ Our pick	Share Leo's Vanicream now → The Unscented Co. Kids* later	iHerb →

* The Unscented Co. Kids is the larger, cheaper everyday bottle — fragrance-, sulfate-, phenoxyethanol- and paraben-free, but it does contain cocamidopropyl betaine (a mild foam booster), the one checklist item it doesn't clear. Vanicream clears everything and is the stricter choice.

Free from	Mild By Nature Castile · body	Vanicream baby + hair	Unscented Co.* Liv hair · backup
SLS / SLES	✓	✓	✓
Parabens	✓	✓	✓
Phthalates	✓	✓	✓
Synthetic fragrance	✓	✓	✓
Sulfate / coco-sulfate	✓	✓	✓
PEGs	✓	✓	✓
Formaldehyde releasers	✓	✓	✓
Triclosan	✓	✓	✓
Mineral oil / petrolatum	✓	✓	✓
Cocamidopropyl betaine	✓	✓	✗
Phenoxyethanol	✓	✓	?
Sodium benzoate	✓	✓	?

Ingredient color = severity of the health concern: 🔴 red — hormone disruptors or carcinogen-linked (parabens, phthalates, fragrance, formaldehyde releasers, triclosan) · 🟡 yellow — skin/eye irritants or contamination byproducts (sulfates, PEGs) · 🟢 green — low concern (mild allergens or preservatives considered safe at normal levels).

✓ free from · ✗ contains · ? preservative not published / unverified. Mild By Nature Castile (~6 ingredients) and Vanicream (10 ingredients) clear the entire list and are independently verified — these are the primary picks.

• Three loads: A = diaper pre-wash (30°C, quick). B = the main load (40°C, longest Cotton). C = towels & sheets (60°C, their own load, never with diapers).
• Front-load enzyme powder only. Never fabric softener, never dryer sheets, never vinegar - they coat the cloth diapers and stop them absorbing.
• Hang clothes to dry in the shade, then 10 minutes low tumble to soften. Towels & sheets go in the dryer on low heat with wool dryer balls.
• Full details are on the two printable cards above: "Before the Wash (Diapers)" and "The Wash — 3 Loads".

• Pajamas are typically worn twice before going in the laundry. Unless they're visibly dirty or smelly, hang them up after use and rewear the next night.

• Daily bath or shower
• Hair wash with soap: every 2 days (not daily). We use one soap for both hair and body
• Exception: if she was in the pool, hair must be washed with soap that evening

• Twice a day: morning + evening
• Evening: once, after both dinner and the yogurt bottle (so right before bed)
• Give her the choice: "Do you want to brush your own teeth, or should I help you?"

• Liv can sit on the toilet by herself and does her business
• She needs reminders and gentle encouragement to go sit and try
• When she says she needs to go - take her immediately, don't rush her or pressure her

One calm routine, run the exact same way by everyone who puts Liv to bed, every night. Goal: Liv settles and stays in her own bed through the night. Calm and consistent. Boring at the door, warm in the bed.

• "Lights on" → a warm amber nightlight (never white or blue). Bright enough to see the room is normal, dim enough to let her body sleep.
• "Stay with me" → give her stuffie a job: "Simba's on duty watching the door till morning." A teammate beats an empty room. Keep a photo of us by the bed.
• "I'm not tired" → never argue; her body truly can't judge this yet. Use the line below instead.

One card (or a hair-tie on her wrist). She may spend it once after lights-out for ONE thing — a hug, a sip of water, one question. Once it's gone, it's gone. Just having the option calms her, so most kids stop using it within a week.

Leaving currently works for her — company, light, fun. We make leaving boring and staying the only thing that pays off.

• Minimal words. One scripted line every time: "It's sleep time. Back to bed." Nothing more.
• Flat face, no eye contact. No smile, no frustration, no negotiation. Be a boring sleep-robot.
• Minimal touch. Guide her back, quick tuck, leave.
• Repeat as long as it takes. Night 1 may be 15–30 trips. That IS the work — the count drops fast.

Your job is not to entertain the child. You are a guide - you create a safe environment, remove obstacles, and step in when needed. Within that safe space, Liv is free to explore, play, and discover on her own terms. Let her lead. Follow her curiosity. Intervene for safety, not for control.

Liv cooperates best when things are playful. Make it fun, not a command. Use animal sounds, act things out, be silly, give her choices. "Do you want to walk like a frog or a penguin to the bathroom?" works better than "go to the bathroom now."

Children under 6 absorb language effortlessly - they don't learn it, they absorb it. If your English isn't strong, speak your native language with her. She will understand over time, and it's much better for her to hear rich, natural speech in any language than broken English.

Describe the specific action instead of generic praise. This builds genuine confidence.

• After giving an instruction, count to 10 in your head before repeating. Toddlers need time to process - they'll often start responding by the time you reach 8
• When showing how to do something, don't talk at the same time. Either show silently OR explain with words - not both. They can't watch your hands and listen to your voice at once
• Don't finish their sentences. Let them take as long as they need to get the words out

Children don't need adults to make them play. They need space, time, and freedom. When a child plays alone, they are building concentration, creativity, and independence. Every time we interrupt - even with good intentions - we break that process.

• When drawing with her, make squiggles and loose lines - not perfect pictures. If she sees a perfect flower and can only scribble, she might not try at all
• Always take your own paper. Never draw on the child's paper

A child's emotions are just as real to them as yours are to you - even if the reason seems small. The best way to help them "get over it" is to help them go through it.

• Acknowledge the feeling first: "I can see you're frustrated" or "That made you really sad." This alone often defuses a meltdown
• Never say "stop crying," "you're fine," or "it's not a big deal"
• Give them feeling words: "You're angry because the tower fell down." Over time they learn to say it instead of hitting or screaming
• All feelings are okay. Some actions are not. "You can be angry. You can't hit."
• Connect first, logic later. When they're flooded with emotion, explanations won't get through. Comfort first, talk after they've calmed down
• If they're tired or moody, they may only hear your words and miss your tone - be extra gentle and clear
• Children open up more while doing something together (drawing, building, walking) than when you sit them down face to face

We don't reward Liv for doing things, and we don't condition food or other benefits on her behavior. No "if you do X, you get Y" or "no dessert unless you finish your plate." She eats because she's hungry, she behaves because she understands - not because of a deal.

• Liv (2.5y): Understands simple instructions, loves helping, wants to do things herself. Give choices between two options.
• Leo (newborn, June 2026): Gentle handling, consistent routines, calm environment. See the Newborn - Leo section for the full guide.

No fixed schedule - we follow Leo's cues - but we keep the SAME order every wake-up. The order matters, not the clock. This is the E.A.S.Y. routine from The Baby Whisperer (Tracy Hogg): Eat, Activity, Sleep, and "You" (your own time while he sleeps - not feeding him back to sleep, so feeding and settling stay separate).

• Circadian clock from ~1 month: day is 6am-7pm, the rest is night. In the evenings, lights down and wind-down (same wind-down works for Liv too).
• Grounding: at least twice a day, hold Leo skin-to-skin on the grass in the sun - we do the grounding for him.

Breast milk first whenever it's available - we treat it as sacred and never waste it. Formula the rest of the time.

• Formula: mix it with our "Drinking water" - the RO (Philips) tap - at the right temperature. Never the regular house taps. See Water & Hydration.

• Barrier / rash cream: only when it's needed (some redness or irritation), not at every change.
• If his bottom is very red: at EVERY change, rinse it with lukewarm water instead of using wipes - wipes make the irritation worse. Pat dry, don't rub.

• Where: first ~3 months in a crib in our room. Around 3 months we may move him to a floor bed.
• Swaddle: at night, arms held snug to his chest, legs free. Try with and without and see what Leo prefers.
• Keep the room dark, cool and quiet. Newborns are noisy sleepers (grunts, squirms) - that's not a wake-up; pause before going in.
• White noise or soft, calm music for sleep is fine - either one, whatever settles him. Keep it low and steady, across the room (not right by his head).
• Sleep "training" from ~3 months: a gentle, very gradual Ferber-style approach. Never more than 3 minutes of crying, and always the 60-second watch first.

• Start from day one, awake and supervised. Short, frequent bursts (1-2 minutes per wake period), building up over time.
• It builds neck, back and shoulder strength and prevents flat spots. Most babies dislike it at first - that's normal, it's hard work.
• Make it easier: a rolled towel under his chest, get down in front of him, sing and pull faces, or use a mirror.

• Optional - fine to use sometimes (a wrap or soft carrier), but it doesn't replace arms and floor time.
• How to wear him safely: face always visible and high on your chest (close enough to kiss), chin off his chest with a finger's gap so his airway stays open, back supported, knees higher than his bottom (an "M" shape). Never let fabric cover his face.

• Visitors holding Leo in the early weeks: we're open to it.
• Photos: some sharing is okay - still within our Photos & Privacy rules (see that section).

Our choices above are from our preferences interview (June 2026, Sean & Yair). We'll revisit them as Leo grows.

• Kids can hold onto something that floats (like a kickboard or pool noodle) if they need support. If they were in the pool, hair must be washed with soap that evening (see Daily Routines).

• NO arm floaties, water wings, or inflatable rings—nothing that wraps around their arms or body and actively makes them float.

If kids rely on floaties, they won't learn how to swim or how to float naturally. We want them to develop real water safety skills—feeling the water, learning balance, and building confidence on their own terms.

• Only people we've specifically told you about can pick up or be alone with Liv
• If someone you don't recognize comes to the door or claims to pick her up - do not let them. Call us

• Sharp objects, cleaning products, small items out of reach
• Extra care with newborn - Liv is curious and still learning to be gentle

The only exception is travel - car, train, airplane. During travel she's allowed a phone or tablet.

Simple, safe, hands-on activities to do at home. Printable one-page guides live here.

A no-chemicals kitchen activity - just flour, salt, oil, water, and food coloring, warmed on the stove into soft dough.

• Adult handles the hot pan and stirring; kids do the mixing, coloring, and kneading once cool
• Taste-safe but salty so kids won't eat it; store sealed, lasts ~2 weeks

Open printable Playdough page (EN)